Every child is unique in their own way and calling a child, an intelligent one or bright one, does not make him more than a child who is a creative one or an athlete one.
In any case, either we would like to see our child, growing to be somebody good at academics or very creative or very good at sports, we need to channelize their enormous bubbling energy and enhance their curiosity quotient, to help them to further sharpen their skills.
But when we talk about the smart parenting, we cannot limit the things only to the child’s intelligence quotient and curiosity quotient, but we need to also help them to improve their emotional quotient, adversity quotient (adaptability to the changing environment), you quotient (self awareness & self-knowledge) and spiritual quotient.
So, now the question is, how do we do this?
With an elaborated research after going through various articles and several reading materials on parenting plus my personal experience of six years with my kid, I have jotted some of the points, which may help us, the parents, in our quench of better and smart parenting.
1.Conversations with kids.
The kids have general tendency to talk to their parents regarding what they see and observe all around. Most of us, when we are free, we explain them. But we tend to ignore or try to satisfy them with some foolish answers, when we are busy or engaged in conversations with some adult or sometimes purposely thinking that the kid doesn't have the right age to know. Here only, we go wrong.
We should explain them with actual facts, then and there, it helps them, a dimension to think, and also helps in brain storming. If we are too busy to address, we must tell them, to ask them again, when we are free and satisfy them with correct answers.
Regarding, some of the weird questions, which we feel, is too much for their age, there, instead of giving wrong answers, we can try, providing them with partial facts and this will help to satisfy their curiosity and at the same time, it will not make them anxious with too much knowledge on those weird topics at that age.
2.Get togethers and family dinners.
When you are in any get-together or family dinners and if your kid is enjoying the company of kids of their age then well and good. But it is not necessary to keep your kids always in the company of other kids of his age, if they don't want.
For the younger kids, elders company makes them a good listener and also boosts their vocabulary. While the teens who sometimes spend time with elders, tend to mature easily and understand the practical approach to life, much earlier than his peers.
3.Engaging them in house chores.
No child is too young to start doing day-to-day chores, depending on their capacity. Studies have found that when kids start doing chores early, they learn important life skills like self-reliance, self-responsibility and also social responsibility.
4.Reading to your kids
Reading regularly with young children stimulates optimal patterns of brain development, which helps build strong pathways in the brain which in turn builds and facilitates language processing, literacy, mental imagery and social-emotional skills that can have life-long health benefits.
In the toddlers, reading helps in channelizing their energy and are less likely to exhibit hyperactive and disruptive behaviors.
For older kids, reading provide them dimension for thinking and make them available with the subjects and topics of their interest and thus help them to identify, select and pursue their interests, at an early age and raise their "You quotient".
5. Let them fail
The kids need not to be nurtured and assisted all the time, just to see them exceling in his endeavors, instead they should be left alone for self-help and allowed to be fail sometimes.
Experiencing failure and going through disappointments, will save them from the sense of entitlement, a feeling where the kids expects special favors from others without reciprocating them.
Failures and disappointments also helps them to foster the ability to handle and overcome the difficult situations of losses, very important for their mental health, when it happens in later stages in life.
Other than this, it will also build a mutual belief system between us and the kids.
6. Be a Sensitive Caregiver
Sensitive caregiving is the way, a parent recognizes and responds to the child's temperaments, likes, dislikes, appropriately & promptly, gets positively involved during interactions with the child and provides a secure base for the child's exploration of the environment.
When we, the parents act as a sensitive caregiver, it helps our kids to develop social skills, being sensitive to others, respecting others feelings and personal space and thus raising their emotional quotient. As per the study, kids who demonstrate these skills are better and successful people managers in their later stages.
7. Be Authoritative but not Authoritarian
The words look similar but they have completely different principles and effects on children.
Both the above involves setting up of the rules for the kids to follow. But compared to authoritarian parenting where parenting style is characterized by high demands and expectations and low responsiveness, low nurturing and hard punishments, authoritative parents are likely to be warm, nurturing and responsive.
Responsive parenting creates secure attachment in the child. Children with secure attachment are happier and healthier. A secure attachment is basically the bond which ensures that your child will feel secure, understood, and calm enough to experience optimal development of his or her nervous system. Your child’s developing brain organizes itself to provide your child with the best foundation for life: a feeling of safety that results in eagerness to learn, healthy self-awareness, trust, and empathy.
8. Productive screen timing.
In today's era completely avoiding screen time is very tough. But we can definitely limit the screen timing and also make it productive. We should inspire the kids to watch some informative. If, not working, we can make their screen timing, the family timing and together watch some animated informative shows or videos. We can try identifying their area of interest and provide them with the related learning videos. This I have done personally and have found good results.
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